Tuesday, February 16, 2010

What a Change.

Sophomore year has definitely brought some changes. Who knew I could change so much in a few months? No one expected it. What's funny was that this year, I wasn't as thrilled after finals ended. Sure, I felt happy but I didn't feel relieved, like a huge weight was dropped from my shoulders. The day after finals just felt like another day to look forward to work, work, more work, and future work. Haha... kinda sad.

Well, this year, a lot happened in so little time. I don't know why, but for some reason, I like this year a lot. Its.... peaceful. All my peers this year seemed to be having a hard time struggling with what they have to do, but this year, I guess it's because of the promise I kept to myself that helped me persevere through all the difficult times. Last semester was a good one for me, and hopefully this semester will be too. The classes I'm taking, the teachers I have, and their learning styles are all very different from one another, but it's trained me to adapt to their learning systems. It's helped me realize that there's no use to complaining because in the future, no one's going to change or make way to fit everything based on your needs.

Other than than the mutual changes that all my classmates and I felt, personally, there were a lot of changes for me.

Sophomore year definitely kept me busy, and on my toes. There were many things to prepare for outside of school. Bellevue youth symphony auditions for violin (which are coming up very soon), piano competitions, and other music preparations kept me busy. Having to practice hours every day regardless of the time of day exhausted me but I pushed myself to focus and concentrate. The reason was, I wanted to work hard because I knew everything I do now would shape my future. Other than music, there was community service, NHS, key club (which I haven't been to go for a while now, because of mock trial), and Mock Trial. Community service and Mock Trial took a lot of my time due to the insane amount of homework (especially at the beginning) and the club meetings lasting until 4:30, held at least 3 times a week. From looking at the kinds of things I participated, it made realize what I should and shouldn't have been involved in based on my main priorities and schedule. This semester, I want to focus and dedicate even more time onto my main focuses outside of school: piano and violin. Why? Because from looking back into semester 1, it gave me the feeling that I was a bit scattered all over the place, and I didn't have a strong foundation, or at least a focus point on one specific area. There's so much I want to do with music and I'm just too excited to prepare for it all.

Another major change has been orchestra. This year, orchestra is very different from last year. We have a ton of freshman, and a lot of violas. I miss Logan and Kailee dearly. I miss sitting next to Logan and playing with him. I miss rehearsing and getting coachings when all of us were in our private string quartet. I miss getting rides from Kailee and listening to her singing along to "Into the Woods." Hahaha. But nonetheless, I've been working hard to be a "decent" leader for the orchestra. As concertmistress, I'm trying to set a good example and not be a negative influence for the freshman, but sometimes, it's a bit frustrating when they don't pay attention, or constantly talk when they're not supposed to. But all in all, I get the feeling that being concert mistress this year was harder than it was in freshman year during 1st semester. Anyways, I'm doing my best for KM's orchestra and of course for Logan and Kailee!

Well.... other than the major changes, this year, I remember the times when I was discouraged. There were times when I wanted to lose hope and forget about the promise I made to myself. But it was during these times, when I realized at the end of the day, I would regret my whole life from giving up after just a little pain. This year, I learned that if I really want something, I'll do whatever it takes and go all lengths, regardless of the challenges and the barriers.

Looking into the future makes me aware that I have so much more that I want to accomplish, achieve, and work for. And it's sophomore year when I'm finally getting the sense that I'm growing up - that I am a young adult, preparing and shaping my future during these remaining years of high school. I've always known that I'm not a quitter, but this year, the fire for my determination has lit even more.

Overall, the whole "feel" of being a sophomore is totally different from being a 9th grader. But, I wouldn't have it any other way. Although my view on sophomore year isn't the same as the majority of my classmates, it makes me aware that my productivity during the summer paid off.

I hope 2nd semester is a success for all the hardworking and determined KMTA classmates. I know all of us work so hard, and have our own individual goals. I wish the best of luck for all of you, and I pray that you'll stay put to your promises and never give up! Let's make the last year of being a KMTA student and an underclassman (if that's a word) our utmost best!

Good luck, class of 2012!


walikeheke said...

I miss you too, dear! I miss you a lot, remember that you're always welcome to call me up or text me. I'm glad things are going well for you.

Royals said...

Thanks Kailee. Your comment means a lot and put a smile on my face :D

I hope college is going well, and I know you'll succeed in whatever you do... because you truly are such a determined, hard worker! (: